Sunday, November 21, 2004

i have not been asleep for 24 hours.

i feel numb. i lost when i challenged my heart's immutable refusal to weep. no tears would roll down my cheeks, just when i know they're supposed to. no feelings of anguish, sadness or remorse. numb. cold.

or maybe im not numb. maybe i just became sober. and that's what i have been praying for.. to see the light.

with that prayer finally answered, i'll start my day with a prayer of thanks:

Thank you God, for showing me that greater things are ahead of me. I am wrong to resent You sometimes when the pain I'm experiencing is too much to bear, when I feel that there's no one to reach out to. You, countless cold nights and my tear-soaked pillow are the only witnesses to my suffering. Yet, with You, I feel enough comfort to help see me through. I know that every pain you give me is a blessing, and a lesson in disguise.

Please bless the people who have hurt me, and hold them in the palm of Your hand, for they make me a wiser, stronger, more compassionate person.. Please allow me to be able to learn further how to forgive and share love, just as these people have taught me.

Amen.

--------------------------------------------------------------------
SOBER - Jennifer Paige

I see the light, oh what a light
And I am sober
All that you served to me
No longer will I drink it in
I took the time to think it over
I see the you that I never knew
Now it's finally sinking in
I am sober







pixie
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